Given the chance, no body would want to hurt another person. Well, no one morally grounded and sane at least.
By all means, each and every one of us would rather go through our days without having someone blame us for their pain or heartbreak.
But in the last few months, I've come to a realization: In life, there are many facts that we cannot escape. 1 plus 1 equals two, the sky is blue, and you will hurt others whether or not you want to.
Everywhere we go, we are constantly reminded to chase after our happiness. "Start running!" the motivational posters will cheer. But as all races go, you must inevitably leave others behind.
I am a firm believer that your relationship with yourself must be the ultimate priority. So what does that make you if to keep your level of comfort high, you must let another person down? Selfish? Yes, but in order not to define our lives by what other people expect from us, sometimes it is completely necessary to be so. This can often times be viewed as "cruelty", but in truth, it is just as human a trait as breathing.
Because let's face it; we've all been there. We have all been put in circumstances wherein staying would only prolong our suffering, but reduce it for someone else's.
Maybe your parents wanted you to take up a course that would continue the family legacy, but you chose the one you knew you were passionate about. You knew you were breaking their hearts, but you also knew you were staying true to yours.
Maybe your friends warned you about that new guy who's been messaging, but you continued to pursue that relationship anyway. You knew your peers disapproved, but you disregarded them nonetheless.
And sometimes, it's not even just indirectly disappointing our loved ones with our opposing decisions. Sometimes we look at these loved ones, and simply choose a whole other person over them. Not because these people have lacked in giving us care and support, but because we believe there is still more out there to receive.
Situations like that is the hardest to justify at night when the guilt seeps in-- how can you look at a perfect support system and convince yourself it was worth abandoning? It's difficult, but somehow, you manage to.
So here you have two sides to the coin of selfishness, but whichever face you land on, I only ask one thing from you: In your pursuit for personal happiness, please never forget to be kind.
I do not mean to stay in a situation that you no longer want to be in. But if you choose to walk away, remember that you are not only leaving a circumstance, but a person who may view your departure as a sign that they were insufficient or lacking. It may not be your intention, but once you hurt someone, you can never convince them or anyone that you didn't. Remember that in betraying someone's heart, you teach it something that they make take years to unlearn. So please, if you're going to put anyone through that much pain, understand that it is only polite of you to close the door on your way out. And if you ever choose to come back home, please understand if the entry's already been locked.
They do not question you for hurting them, and for that, they expect that you too will not question why you can't be around for their healing.